Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Adventures

The Jackie Chan Adventures

The Secrets Of Pro Wrestling Exposed!!!

 

CHAPTER I "The Ring & Props"

SPLINTER: In the world of professional wrestling today you probably wonder how wrestlers pull off those so-called violent moves inside the ring or squared circle without hurting one another although the moves may look dangerous and violent to the fans watching from ringside or at home on their TVs. But the SECRET in wrestling is that the wrestlers do not hurt each other physically because they are taught to not risk injury to themselves or opponents. Each move is carefully choreographed like a ballet or soap-opera TV show.

UNCLE SHENG: Aye-yiyiyi! The wrestlers take their cues from the Booker or Big Boss who decides who wins & loses, titles change hands or remain with the champion, etc. He casts one wrestler to play the role of hero or Baby-Face and another wrestler to play the role of villain or Heel. Often or sometimes wrestlers will betray one another, turn against each other and join the other side so to speak or the usual gang-style attacks on helpless opponents until another comes to the rescue! But that's up to the Booker as he instructs wrestlers to play their roles for the fans at ringside. And the wrestlers do what the Booker tells them to do because he's paying them BIG BUCKS for jobs well done.

JADE: After the wrestlers, referees, and managers receive their marching orders from the Booker, they leave to carry out the instructions to the letter.† The fans begin to enter the arena where the Booker and his assistants pass out hand-painted signs for the fans to display & wave in the stands to cheer the heroes, boo the villains. You didn't think the fans brought those signs from home did you??? Also the Heels like to turn up the volume on the crowd, make them boo, jeer, hiss and threaten them by shouting-taunting-mocking into the microphones known as "TURN UP THE HEAT" so the audience goes crazy. When the BabyFaces speak into the microphones they want the audience to cheer & shout for them!

APRIL O'NEIL: Managers & Valets (The wrestler's girlfriend) always stand at ringside to cheer on their protege (another name for wrestler) to victory, distract the opposing wrestler, argue with the referee, etc. Often or not managers jump into the ring when they fear their wrestler or wrestlers are going to lose a match and that automatically results in disqualification-outside interference! But there comes a time when the referee does not see the distraction from outside the ring and the managersí and/or valetsí interference results in instant victory for their wrestlers. Here is one such example of outside interference...

"Raphael and Battletoad Rash are fighting inside the ring with Ninjara yelling for her boy to win shouting "Come on, come on!" urging Raph on. Then as Rash goes to rebound off the ropes she grabs his leg hard, jerking him off-balance and he spins around to insult her, she threatens back. Suddenly Raphael cannonballs into the toad from his blindspot, toppling Rash outside onto the floor. Immediately the referee pushes the turtle away so he can start the 10-count in the amount of time the toad needs to climb back into the ring. As Raphael is arguing with the ref trying to act neutral, Ninjara starts laying in some powerful kicks & punches into the helpless Rash making him cry out in pain and fall down several times. Then Raphael tells the ref "Turn around" and he does to see the lady fox standing calmly in her neutral corner doing nothing, whistling to herself, an innocent expression on her face. "Did you hit him?" asks the referee and she responds "No, I did not" while Raphael pulls Rash back through the ropes into the ring again"

CAPTAIN BLACK: The referee is supposed to be a policeman directing law & order in the ring during the matches. But unfortunately he can't keep control of everything at once. Shoving or hitting the ref is a no-no and will result in disqualification and a quick trip to the showers. But referees accidentally get knocked down, tossed out of the ring, beaten unconscious, etc. That can happen to the man in black and white stripes but he's doing his job in the sport because the Booker pays him to carry out his instructions to the letter. Sometimes the referee does the "TURN THE BLIND EYE" when he purposely turns his back on one situation to witness another scene happening in front of him when the real action takes place behind his back!!! An example is the following...

"A tag-match between Chan & Toro VS Leo & Don has the masked wrestler with Leo in a front headlock as Don reaches over the top ropes to tag his partner so he can jump into the fray. The referee carefully watches to make sure the tag is legal when out of the corner of his eyes he sees Chan jumping between the ropes on his side of the ring to protest Donatello slapping the outstretched hand of Leonardo as he backs El Toro into their corner. The referee rushes in to stop Chan from getting into the match because he did not tag in all the while Jackie is trying to tell him both turtles are ganging up on Toro! Don & Leo sucker-punch & kick the luchador helplessly in their corner as the ref whirls back around to shoo Donatello back to his corner because the ref did not see the legal tag and therefore cannot count it so to speak. Donnie & the ref yell back & forth while Chan & Toro double-team poor Leo in their corner to the boos of the fans."

JADE: When fans see the poor defenseless wrestler being beaten by his attackers they become enraged! Not only do they boo the referee for not doing his job, in reality they are booing the Heels since they are doing their job to make the fans hate them.

APRIL O'NEIL: Referees also take their cues from the ringside commentators calling the play-by-play action at their tables. It is the announcers who decide when the match should end due to the reaction of the audience. When the crowd is really getting into the heat of the action the commentators put up 2 fingers telling the referee to allow the match to continue another 10 minutes. If the crowd is bored, the commentators put up 1 finger telling the referee to prepare to end the match in 5 minutes. And when the man in black and white stripes sees the announcer wave his pen in the air that is the signal to bring down the curtain, make the 3-count and raise the hand of the winner!

UNCLE SHENG: The Booker creates the CARD or schedule of matches starting with the first match at the bottom and working all the way to the top...i.e. to the MAIN EVENT!!! He decides if a World Heavyweight Championship will be defended by the champion or if it will go to the challenger, or if it will be a non-title bout. He comes up with outrageous matches for the fans to cringe-flinch-cheer-boo ranging from...

(1) Steel Cage (1-on-1 or Tag-Team)

(2) Battle Royals

(3) Street Fights

(4) Tables-Ladders-Chairs

(5) First Blood

(6) Taped Fist

(7) Loser Leaves Federation

(8) Texas Death-Tornado

(And various other matches)

UNCLE SHENG: One more thing! (His favorite line) If a Booker instructs a wrestler to win or lose that wrestler will win or lose...but how he does is up to him and his opponents since they are doing all the rough stuff in the ring.

SPLINTER: But more is still to come in the upcoming parts of THE SECRETS OF PRO WRESTLING EXPOSED as my ninja students, BattleToads, Jackie Chan, Ninjara, Viper, El Toro reveal more of what goes on behind the scenes in the world of pro wrestling!

END OF PART I

 


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