Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Adventures

The Jackie Chan Adventures

The Secrets Of Pro Wrestling Exposed

PART 2

 

CAPTAIN BLACK: But there is more to pro wrestling than meets the eye. We now focus our attention to the main feature itself...THE RING. A wrestling ring or squared circle resembles a boxing ring in many ways but different in appearance since a boxing ring uses a hard canvas surface and 4 ropes surrounding the combatants while a wrestling ring uses a soft canvas surface and 3 ropes surrounding the combatants. We shall discuss each portion of the squared circle to reveal its hidden secrets so you can understand how they work.

SPLINTER: First, the ropes that encircle the grapplers that supposed to keep them inside the ring at all times. They play an important part of every wrestler's arsenal. Made of corded metal wrapped in vinyl or plastic sleeves the ropes can be used to propel a wrestler around and add impact to a move. Wrestlers can make their opponents helpless by tying them up and pounding away until the referee orders them to stop and back off so they can untie them from the ropes, freeing their arms & wrists. Most commonly wrestlers throw their opponents into the ropes and catch them with a devastating move on the rebound.

JADE: Next, the turnbuckles. The ring has in each corner 3 turnbuckles, consisting of small metal rings covered with thick layers of foam padding. Turnbuckles anchor the ring ropes but much like the ropes themselves they make handy weapons. By what I mean...wrestlers get slammed headfirst into the buckles by their opponents and it may hurt to the fans but they cushion the impact of head and/or face contact instead like orthopedic pillows used in hospitals. Other times, one wrestler pins another against the buckles, climbs atop them, towering above his helpless enemy, and bangs away with a flurry of blows as the audience takes up the chant-count "1-2-3" and so forth until the ref orders him to back off and let his enemy out of the corner. Wrestlers throw their opponents into the turnbuckles resulting in a loud "CLANK" and wince from the crowd.

UNCLE SHENG: Or they climb the buckles and jump into the air from flying dropkicks, body press, elbows and perhaps a devastating suplex too! Aye-yiyi!

APRIL O'NEIL: A wrestling mat canvas consists of the following...under the canvas are several layers of foam padding like the type used to cushion the impacts of Hollywood stunt people. Beneath that are sheets of plywood that add an extra bounce-effect but create sound effects of the hard landings. Then under the ring itself are giant suspension coil-springs to absorb the landings from dropkicks, body slams, suplexes, splashes, etc. and create a bounce-effect making wrestlers bounce back up an inch or two. And finally, let's not forget that underneath the ring are hidden microphones that record all the action & excitement of the matches taking place in the squared circle and the sounds are played back LIVE throughout the arenas for the audience to listen to and interact.

SPLINTER: There are 4 metal ring-posts mounted to the floor outside the ring. They anchor the turnbuckles and frequently become part of the action too. Unlike a turnbuckle the ring-post has no give, so collisions with it can result in broken bones, bloody gashes if wrestlers are not careful whenever they brawl outside the ring in front of the excited crowd. Getting thrown into the post will hurt painfully and the results would be bloody cuts, bruises or welts and probably migraine headaches if wrestlers get hit on the head with them.

JADE: Have you ever watched wrestlers yell, scream, cry, grunt, groan in pain from the blows they receive & dish out? That is known as "Selling A Match" or pretending to be in pain to make it look real & violent for the audience to cheer, boo, wince, cringe, flinch. Because if wrestlers did not sell their so-called painful moves wrestling would be, well...BORING! Here are some examples...

"Jackie Chan is trapped in the corner by Ninjara who reaches out and scratches her fingers across his face making him cry out and grab his eyes in pain. But what really happens is the lady fox does not poke his eyes but simply drags her hand across his face being careful to avoid poking the eyes in the process. Next she drags Chan face-first across the ropes and he's yelling out more agony of having his face burned on the ropes. Again Chan protects his face by holding his hand atop the rope with his head resting against his hand and sells the move by crying out in pretend pain. Ninjara bangs Chan's head off the top turnbuckle then throws him to the mat while he groans in relief and tries recovering himself before the vixen can attack him again with more moves"

UNCLE SHENG: Then there is the Salt In The Eye trick where a wrestler throws a handful of salt into his opponent’s face making him scream and clutch his eyes and drop to hands & knees in pain. One more thing, the danger of throwing real salt in the face will result in temporarily blindness so grapplers instead use talcum powder or baby powder since it creates a white-cloud and is harmless. Then the other wrestler who got hit in the kisser with the stuff sells the so-called painful move.

SPLINTER: Another prop is the Chair hits to face, head or back. Wrestlers always use chairs like weapons to bonk their enemy over the noggin taking them down like a felled tree chopped by an axe and stand over them daring them to get back up so they can do it again. Yet the danger in striking one with a chair will result in permanent injuries and trauma if one is not careful. So how do wrestlers strike one another with chairs??? Instead they aim for the shoulder-areas just below the neck-area and deliver a gentle-less-violent blow to their enemy and the opponent grabs his head and pretends to be in agony selling the move. Often times wrestlers toss a chair to their opponent who catches it then jump up and dropkick it full-force into their enemy's face knocking him down.

CAPTAIN BLACK: Or my personal favorite...slammed into a table at ringside that collapses on impact! A standard-sized table is built out of cordwood or cracked sawdust making it very light, yet sturdy. Yet it does hurt to have one's head slammed into it repeatedly, believe me. But the real excitement comes when one is slammed through it from body slam, suplex or whatever moves are used. Since the table is lighter than the concrete floor it breaks the wrestler's crash landing on contact and splits apart like cardboard. Tables are often taken into the ring and used as devastator finishers to end a wild match in minutes!

APRIL O'NEIL: Then there is the blood, ack-gross! Wrestlers always bleed from cuts received from chair-shots, slammed into ring-posts, etc. But how does it get there, is it real or fake? This is called "Juicing" and here is what I mean...

"Michaelangelo has been hammered several times by Pimple and the referee orders him to back off while he checks his opponent. "Step back, stay there" orders the ref to Pimple who obeys the command then goes to see how Mikey is doing. "How ya doing buddy?" he asks him then says "Here ya go" and hands him a tiny razorblade wrapped in masking tape. So much for the referee being the policeman in the ring but we already know he's behind on the scheme...Now Pimple drags Mikey to the corner and removes the padding from the top buckle. "What are you doing?" the ref wants to know before the battletoad slams the ninja turtle's head into the exposed steel ring! "Hey! Get over here," demands the ref as the toad turns to say "What?!" and tries covering up when the ref asks him why he slammed Mike's head into the steel and he protests "I didn't do anything," trying to act innocent. Meanwhile Michaelangelo takes the razor and carefully makes a tiny cut above his forehead so the blood starts running down his face so it would appear as if he got cut after coming into contact with the steel on the buckles"

SPLINTER: But we still have more SECRETS to reveal to you fans out there...Coming up next the Turtles, Chan, Ninjara, Viper, Toro, Tohru, Zitz, Rash and Pimple will demonstrate the moves used in the ring to show you how they are done correctly and without serious injuries.

END OF PART II

 


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